So it’s my wedding anniversary, as well as my blog anniversary. Ten years ago I started a blog, and nine years ago I started a marriage, and although many many many particulars of my life have changed in the intervening years, those two things remain constant.
I once read a description of marriage by blogger Black Hockey Jesus, which I feel pretty confident I have quoted here before, but I totally love it:
It’s no secret that everything changes; the ground is constantly shifting. Flux is the essential nature of the cosmos as such. So for two people to look the basic fact of existence—change—in the eye, only to then look each other in the eye and declare: In relation to you, I WILL NOT CHANGE, that’s pretty badass. Whenever the subject of raging against the fundamental nature of things arises, it’s likely that I can get on board. So here’s to staying together in a world made of undoing at its ever changing coreless core. Clink your glasses. Bang a drum. Dream wild dreams. And go live one.
Individually, we are quite different nine years on. The difference between age 28 and age 37 is . . . a big difference. The intervening states we have lived in, the children we have created and the changes to our lives they brought . . . flux is the essential nature of the cosmos.
But in relation to each other, we have not changed. There are times when that is easier to do, and times when it is not so easy. But is has never, not once in nine years, been negotiable. I am thankful every day that I picked this person to be my constant, a person himself in constant flux who consistently and willing directs his energy toward me and the life we have created together. One who purposefully and willfully changes in conformity to the eternity of this marriage, even if at times it comes at some personal cost.
Here’s to looking you in the eye, keeping the promise of constancy, and living the dream. Nine down, one year til we can make excuses for some sort of big splashy decade-a-versary vacation!