Tune Up

Ah, bein’ old.

My old thyroid thing is acting up.  The diagnosis was just within the last year, so it makes sense that it takes time to normalize things.  It also makes sense that a GP who works at a university student health center is not the best source for treatment, even for a run of the mill issue like mine.  Next year when I’m working and have some dollaz, I’ll see an endocrinologist (I guess – is that who I’d see?)

Meanwhile, in these povertous days, I’ve had a blood test, and tomorrow I go in to talk to that same (free) Student Health GP and convince him to up my prescription.  I found out that other people with my thyroid condition are taking medication that is 20 times stronger than what I take.  Since discovering that, I remembered that my dose was kept incredibly low on purpose because I was still nursing Liam when they diagnosed me, and it was always meant to be raised, but then a change of doctors (and a summer job away) intervened, as did my own failure to write this shizz down and advocate for my own damn self.  I need to take a firmer hand in my health!  I’m at the age where I have to say those types of things!

What that means for me now is that my thyroid is swollen and it’s hard to swallow right now.  I feel like I have an Adam’s apple.  Also, I have the joint aches again – I feel like I have the flu.  And I am D-R-A-G-G-I-N-G.  No motivation, no energy, no nothing.  I just want to flop on the couch at all times.  Luckily I’m a 3L, so it’s not too hard to do that.  It’s just these pesky children of mine that keep me from being a total slob.

The biggest, most annoying thing, however, is the fatness.  I didn’t run at all this week – I barely have the energy to be awake, and besides my joints are killing me – and as a result I’ve gained 6 pounds.  SIX.  I’m not on a crazy restrictive diet, but neither am I indulging in heavy cream and pastries on a daily basis.  The metabolism slow-down means that my weight is like a runaway train, and only running 20 miles per week keeps it in check.  Running 20 miles in a week doesn’t LOWER my weight, mind, it just keeps me from adding even MORE pounds on.  At this rate, I’m going to have to invest in a whole new wardrobe very soon.  I’m not kidding.  Nothing will zip anymore.

Rather than do that, I’m going to take MOAR PILLZ and get this sorted out.  Unfortunately, not in time for my sister’s wedding, which is fast approaching (exactly one month away!)  Sigh.  More pictures of fat me in a bridesmaid dress.  Luckily, my breathtaking sister will steal the show, wearing our mother’s wedding dress, and no one will even notice me.

*Insert paragraph about value judgments and weight in America, shallowness, vanity, our obesity epidemic, and other deep and thoughtful commentary.  I’m too tired and thryoid depleted to write it right now, but you can imagine how brilliant it could have been.*

*PS this thyroid excuse is pretty exploitable.  It’s almost as good as being pregnant, for getting out of having to expend effort on things, such as thoughtful, non-stream-of-consciousness blog entries.*

Anyway, enough about my health!  I’m going to go eat my lunch of a very small sandwich and apple, which will expand my waistline by ten inches by the end of the day, no doubt.  And I’ll try to do something worthwhile with the two hours I have til Jack comes home from school and wreaks havoc on my ability to droop all over the couch like a wilted flower.