. . . to give you a quick developmental update from your sponsors, The Slave and The Other Slave.
So, the cute thing du jour is that you are getting extremely vocal about poop. Lemme tell you, no Blue Collar Comedy episode has a thing on you when it comes to poop jokes. There is some kind of constipation issue going on with you at the moment – perhaps it’s too much cereal? – but for whatever reason, pooping has become something more of a struggle. And you fight that battle, daily, and you fight it loud and proud, and you fight it loud and proud wherever you happen to be, even if it’s in the middle of, say, the Sephora beauty products store at the mall. You get a really angry look on your face and make really, really prolonged grunts. You ball up your fists and stretch out your toes and furrow your brow and scream. WE’re lookin’ at a great career in heavy weightlifting for you, you’ve totally got the mannerisms down. I wish Uncle Clif was around so he could coach you – something tells me he’d be a good poop coach!
Another thing you’ve just started doing these last couple of days is wiggling down in the bath. Normally I sit you up in the bath and most of you is sticking out in the air, and you’ve been sort of fine with that, but a couple of days ago you discovered that if you arch your back and wiggle your butt, you can shimmy on down and get more of your body in that warm water. So this is always what you do, immediately upon contact with the water, smiling all the while. You only stop when the water level is at your chin, like a nanometer from your mouth, which makes me nervous but what can I do? You have to get clean! So I watch you very closely to make sure you don’t drown yourself, and let you luxuriate in the warmness of the bath water. The neat thing about this is not just the cuteness of your bathtime wiggle, but the fact that you are understanding action and reaction. You have made the connection between warm water, wiggling, full body immersion, and pleasure, and that is quite a developmental leap from a couple of months ago, when you just let things happen to you, and cried when they sucked and smiled when they were good. You are making good things happen for yourself, wee son, and I hope you never forget that skill through your life.
Yesterday you were in your Exersaucer and you choked on your own spit, which is a pretty common thing since you drool approximately two gallons of spit a day (teething is a pain!). This time, though, you really couldn’t catch your breath for a while, and you got really scared. You looked at me with these terrified eyes, choking away, and I knew you were fine but I swooped you up and held you until you could breathe normally again. And the thing is, this actually made me feel good, because even 5 months on I have The Anxiety about The Crib Death, and seeing you fight so hard to catch a breath makes me even more certain that you aren’t about to up and stop breathing any time soon. Good boy.
I love you more every day, Jack Attack, and miss you more every day when I’m at work. You are a blessing, an absolute blessing, and don’t let me joking about how you were a surprise, how you are soooo big and fat, how you seem to eat eat eat constantly, don’t let all of that make you think that I’m unhappy with you in any way. I have this urge to talk at you constantly, and I think most people do (probably an evolutionary thing to help you learn language), and so lots of stuff comes out of my mouth. But none of it is critical, because I can’t think of a thing about you that I would change. Except maybe to have you here at work with me every day! You’re a joy, to both your dad and me. We love you lots, now and always.