A Glimpse Inside My Dreams, of Late

I was being chased, along with my partner.  We were in an enormous library with dozens of floors, each floor a different layout with hallways, reading rooms, study carrels.  It should have been relatively easy to lose our pursuers given the complexity of the building, but they kept on our tails.  My partner and I split up – I headed for the stairwell, and he took off through a long open hallway full of students.  We each still had a tail on us, but only I was worth chasing.  My partner was a decoy, carrying a backpack full of trash.

I was carrying precious cargo, something worth more than diamonds, and I was trying to find my fence in the library and simultaneously lose the thug who was chasing me.  I stumbled/ran down at least ten flights of stairs, and then pushed open the door to the floor I was on.  I immediately ducked back into the stairwell, and watched from below as my tail flew through the swinging door.  I tiptoed up past him to the floor above, snickering at my cleverness and his stupidity, and slipped out the stairwell door.  In no time, my fence appeared next to me, carrying a backpack and a laptop case, disguised as an ordinary student.  We walked nonchalantly to a study room, then stepped inside and shut the door.  I pulled out my sack of items that I was planning to sell him, and he asked to see the merchandise.

“This one,” I said, pulling the item out reverently, “is worth at least $100,000.  What I have in this bag is worth over $30 million, so you just tell me how much you’re interested in taking with you today.”  I passed my sample over to him carefully, carefully, and he stroked it gently with one finger, testing its authenticity.  He started to argue me down, claiming it was not the highest quality he’d seen.  I pointed out all the reasons why he was getting a steal.

I woke up before the deal was done, so I don’t know whether my dream self got her deal or not, nor can I tell you if I got out of that library without being caught.  What I do know, however, is that the expensive item I was trying to unload for a cool hundred grand was a Taco Bell sauce packet.  Extra Hot.

Pregnancy just keeps getting weirder and weirder.