Gasp

I Didn’t Vote.

This is bad.

I always vote. Except sometimes, when you don’t get t.v. stations, or the local paper, or work in the local area, you don’t realize that it’s voting day. Until 10pm on voting day, when you catch up on Wonder Women and turn with a furrowed brow to your political science student husband and say – Honey? Was there an election today?

This is inexcusable. Here are my excuses.

(1) I work an hour from the county where I live/am registered to vote. It be hard to get to the booths, mon.

(2) Um, can I still use first trimester of pregnancy as an excuse? I’m only a week out of it. What good was 3 months of puking if I can’t get out of some social responsibilities?

(3) Due to aforementioned lack of t.v., local paper, etc., I know nothing about any candidates or propositions. I always feel guiltier voting sans information than I do about skipping altogether. Had I used my 29 year old brain that has been eligible to vote for 11 years, I would have realized one was coming up and boned up on stuff. But, um, see number 2.

(4) I voted last year. The year before. I vote all the time! I promise! Don’t we get to drop our lowest quiz grade in this class?

So, I am the poster child for bad, bad American. But my sister is worse. She doesn’t vote ever, I think largely to irritate me. She’s very proud of her complete ignorance of the electoral process and all issues, candidates, propositions, etc. She loooves to drive me crazy with this. I looove to point out how lucky we are to live here and not Myanmar, or North Korea, and she goes Myanmar? Is that a chocolate bar?

Like how I turned this post from chastising myself for not voting to making fun of my sister? Now I look a lot better. Cool.

Peace and socially responsible electoral love to everybody who voted, and for those of us who didn’t – may little elves visit you and tweak your nose and step on your feet and pinch you mercilessly until you agree never to do it again. – G