To The People/Cats in My Life

To my boyfriend:

I haven’t seen you awake in over a week.  We’ve talked on the phone a few times a day – which reminds me of the beginning of our courtship (when we were long distance), a very sweet time.  But otherwise our contact has been reduced to fumbling nighttime-darkness hellos and quit bursts of necessary information, including such conversation gems as “The cat needs more food, make sure to pick some up on your way home,” and “Don’t forget to pay the Verizon bill.”  Just to remind you: you have a girlfriend.  Her name is Gillian, she has brown hair (except for one gray one in the very front that we’re pretending we don’t see), she is 5 foot 6, a stimulating conversationalist, stunningly beautiful (in your eyes, anyway), and you are still her number one guy.  She thanks you for willingly taking a backseat to the other love of her life, the aforementioned b**ch goddess, and looks forward to reminding herself of what your face looks like in just a few short days.

To my sister:

You are my roommate, and I am pretty sure you still live there, because the dishes I leave in the sink are usually done when I get home at midnight, and I stopped believing in the Dish Fairy when I moved out of mom’s house at 18.  Thank you for changing the cat litter and keeping the house from smelling like poop.  Thanks also for picking up the mail every day and leaving mine on the chair for me.  I can’t wait for you to see my play, and I can’t wait to see the one you’re involved in, and I can’t wait to see you again in the daylight, which will probably happen around Christmas time.

To my cat:

I brought a little kitten home and then started rehearsing, and now I have a gangly, adolescent, nearly full-grown cat on my hands.  You grew up pretty fast, and I’m sorry I missed a lot of it.  I promise I will let you play outside every day once this play is done and I can spend time with you.  Thank you for leaving me presents all over the house, like the dead leaves from the ficus that I found in some of my shoes, and the kitchen tea towel that you left in the middle of the office floor.  They are very thoughtful reminders that I do, indeed, have a little pet who is very active whether I’m there or not.  Now stop growing, right now, and just wait a few more days til I can watch it happen.

1 show down, 3 to go, and then life can resume some normalcy!  That is, until the next one . . .